Miss Teen USA 2007 - South Carolina answers a question

Her daddy must be so proud! This video isn't as good as Larry Richette, the pride of PA, but it's worth the post.

TGS's Guy of the Week

Meet Larry Richette. Son of a judge. Author. Alleged mother-beater. And now? Flasher. When approached by a local reporter regarding the whole, you know, beating up his mother issue, Larry responded in a less than friendly way.

The accompanying video is . . . well, its just amazing. And that's why Larry is TGS's inaugural Guy of the Week.*

[Update: YouTube (as usual) delivers]

*Please note that the TGS Guy of the Week award (TGSGOTWA) is unlikely to ever be awarded again, and certainly not on a weekly basis.

TGS Presents: Great Moments in Wikipedia

[Spikeditor's note: This is the third* in an ongoing series of posts highlighting the best of Wikipedia, one of The Big Two's favorite websites.]

This GMIW is enjoyable because it is a particularly Wikipedian find. I have no idea what I originally was looking into, but I had clicked through a number of different topics before stumbling upon the page of Diana Dors, a British blonde bombshell of the 1950s. Ms. Dors lived an interesting life. Amongst other things, she was married to Richard Dawson, was friends with the last woman to be executed in England, and was on the cover (in the front row) of the Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band album. However, this GMIW highlights the anecdote told under the heading "Quote" in Ms. Dors' entry. You see, Dors was not her original surname. Diana had the unfortunate distinction of being born Diana Fluck. The anecdote describes an occasion when confusion over this name led to medium-to-high hilarity.

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In a very loosely related note, some new radio stations have received very interesting call letters.











*An update on the second GMIW: I recently learned of a friend who not only has had a Scotch Egg, but who has them on a regular basis. They are served at a restaurant near his work in nearby Santa Clara. Full report to follow.

Sports Talk: Where We Talk 'a th' Sport!

(For the uninitiated, "Sports Talk with Guy Guyerson" is a sports radio parody bit from the Ron & Fez show on XM202. For anyone who has ever listened to sports talk radio, the parody is hilarious.)

The Buffalo Sabres are selling "New York State Champs" t-shirts. Buffalo went pretty far in last season's NHL playoffs, beating the NY Islanders and the Rangers before ultimately losing to the Ottawa Senators in the Eastern Conference Finals. As ridiculous as it is to declare oneself "state champs", the Sabres really twisted the knife by including "each defeated team's name and score from their game against the Sabres" on the shirt. That's brilliant! Here's the sales blurb from the NHL shop website:

Celebrate the Buffalo Sabres victory and honor their hard work and dedication by wearing this New York State Champions short sleeve cotton tee shirt from Lee Sport. This officially licensed tee shirt is designed with the Buffalo Sabres New York State Champions graphic, Stanley Cup® logo, and eachdefeated team's name and score from their game against the Sabres
screen-printed on the chest.

TGS appreciates the arrogance of the Sabres and may end up following a bit more hockey this year, since this is a NY Giants website and the Giants are going to blow.

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Dave Law has tickets to the Red Bulls game against David Bekham (and the LA Galaxy) on August 18th. The Galaxy are weak, nestled comfortably at the bottom of the West Conference table. They feature a crew of "has-been's" and "never-were's". The most personally disappointing of the "never-were's" for Dave Law is Chris Albright who pledged Dave Law's fraternity at UVa before leaving school in pursuit of his lackluster professional career.

The Red Bulls, on the other hand, are tied for 3rd in the East. I watched the Red Bulls lose a 1-0 heartbreaker to a less talented New England Revolution team on Bastille Day (July 14th - also the anniversary of the Azzuri's victory over the French). New England is currently in 1st place in the East but the Red Bulls were the better team that day. The Red Bulls have one of the most exciting players in the MLS, Juan Pablo Angel. Angel came from English club Aston Villa and he's a little older (Juan tiene treinta-dos anos) but he's fun to watch. With Angel as a striker and Claudio Reyna running the midfield, the Red Bulls have managed to put an explosive product on the field. Plus Miss Universe, Miss USA and Miss Teen USA were on hand for the coin flip for that Revolution game. They also created an explosive situation. Here are some pics:

I love that first picture because it's likely the photographer said to the beauty queens, in an innocent voice, "Turn around so I can get a shot of your names on the Red Bulls jerseys." He sure made certain the shot framed their asses. This is definitive proof that the photographer responsible for these shots was indeed a man. Anycrap... Of course, all of my pseudo-analysis as a casual fan means nothing because the game will most likely be a Bekham-induced circus with little chance of me enjoying quality soccer.

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Barry Bonds has passed Hank Aaron as the "home run king", but Bonds keeps hitting home runs. I heard a discussion on sports talk radio this morning about how the IRS will value Bonds' 756th home run ball for tax purposes. Will they try to estimate the market value which could be $600,000 and tax the dude who caught it? Or will they value it at $5 until it's sold in an auction or something? Here's an interesting article from the SportingNews discussing the question. From what I remember of the tax code, the IRS has the authority to tax the kid who caught the ball based on the ball's estimated fair market value. The kid could argue with the IRS about what that is.

My question for sports fans and collectors of sports memorabilia is: Steroid investigations and A-Rod eclipsing Bonds in 5 years aside, doesn't the value of the 756th home run ball go down everytime Bonds hits another dinger? Wouldn't the last home run ball Bonds hits before he retires be the most valuable? Maybe someone at our sister site SportsMeat can anwer that.

Against the Law: Car Edition

This morning I passed a complete douche on the NJ Turnpike. The NJ Turnpike is full of douches, so the fact that this guy stood out in a crowd of douches warrants blogging. The guy was a contemporary of mine - in his late 20's to early 30's. Given his perceived age, he committed two automotive atrocities. First, he was driving a crimson Chrysler Sebring convertible. With all due respect to Big Swinging D, who used to drive one of these things, the Chrysler Sebring convertible is a car for a housewife from a fly-over state who wants to "let her hair down a little" but not still drive a practical car with ample seating for 4 and a spacious trunk (In fairness to Chrysler, the 2008 Sebring convertible is much better looking than previous models). In the future under Dave's Law, Chryler Sebrings will all have electronic devices which prevent ignition if the car detects a penis in the driver's seat. The douche's second infraction was that he had a vanity plate (from NY, but I'll let that slide today) which read "DAPRDAV". Vanity plates are the "puns" of the "vehicle personalization world". They're the refuge of the witless but occassionally you'll come across a funny pun/vanity plate. "DAPRDAV" is not funny.

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Nissan Altima Coupe

Once again the car industry has earned my contempt. Nissan has introduced an Altima Coupe that is clearly a rebadged Infiniti G35 (the car I drive). Here are some pictures of both cars.

First the Altima

And the G35 Coupe

My car is almost 5, which is old for a car model, but it has been able to retain a lot of the cachet that accompanied it off the lot. I still get compliments at gas stations and lingering stares on highways. Nissan is destroying a beautiful car's legacy among luxury cars by rebadging it (and repricing it) as a MUCH CHEAPER Nissan. BMW's and Mercedes' designs from past decades still look like luxury cars, and in some cases they've aged into classics, because they were never rebadged. The G35 coupe could have been a classic too.

This month Nissan will replace the G35 with a G37 on Infiniti lots. The jury is still out on whether the design is a hit. So far the reviews of the G37 have been positive. Personally, I like the look of the new G sedan and expect I'll like the G37 coupe. Regardless, Nissan has broken "The Law" for rebadging the most innovative and beautifully designed Infiniti of the past 20 years. A car that reinvigorated the Infiniti name and heralded a new age of success for Nissan motors has now been forever cheapened. The next time I spend $30k+ on a luxury car, I will only buy from a manufacturer who does not engage in such blatant re-badging.

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Legal Briefs

• This "dude" summering in Belmar got acquainted with draconian municipal ordinances down there. The local politicians are just tilting at windmills. They'll never reverse the beach/party culture that is so firmly entrenched in NJ's collective consciousness that it's become a rite of passage for NJ youth (and NY and PA youth unfortunately). See NJGuido.com, the Miss NJ scandal and Antonella Barba pics for evidence of the shore culture's influence on NJ. These kids have plenty of money to pay trivial fines which can be viewed alternatively as the cost of a license to party.

• NJ.com has added a page entitled Hoboken Now, which despite the weak name, is an excellent resource for both Hoboken residents and fans of the Mile Square City alike.